Should I or Shouldn’t I????
May 21, 2008
dlbmrb
OK…Here is the deal. When Scott died I was told by the insurance co. that a family member should not go and clean out the car. They said that the tow truck driver did not think it would be a good idea. So we asked a dear friend of ours to do this task for us. He is a Baltimore City Police Officer and we felt that he had probably seen worse. Mike did however tell him to take pictures of the car. He did and he has had them ever since. I found out recently that Mike asked for them. He did this several months ago and looked at them. Now I have been asking to see them for 5 years. I must admit I was a little A LOT upset when he told me this. I felt betrayed somehow and I felt like Mike had lied to me. We have worked that part out. Seriously we cried and talk and each asked for forgiveness we are fine. I however am still a mess. This really threw me into a tailspin. Now I am wrestling with should I see them or shouldn’t I see them. It is strange and I will probably sound like a complete crazy person BUT I feel as if Mike now has a part of Scott that I don’t. Told ya…crazy!!! He has seen the car that Scott took his last breathe in. I am just really struggling with what to do. I have asked all of my on line angel moms. I have gotten so many mixed opinions I just thought I would ask the few of you that read this. So what do you think? Should I or shouldn’t I see the pics???
Entry Filed under: Uncategorized
3 Comments Add your own
Leave a Comment
Some HTML allowed:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <pre> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>
Trackback this post | Subscribe to comments via RSS Feed
1.
Laurie | May 23, 2008 at 3:50 pm
Donna, I just got back online and read this. I’m sorry this has been difficult for you. I’m also sorry that I have no counsel for you regarding whether to see or not to see the pictures. Just know that I am praying for you today as I’m reading.
2.
libby | May 24, 2008 at 9:03 pm
Donna, my heart goes out to you. I can’t imagine this is an easy decision. Personally, I do not think I could handle seeing the pictures. But, I would ask Mike if he feels you should see them or not, if you haven’t done that already.
3.
zoanna | June 8, 2008 at 5:49 pm
Oh, Donna, I can’t imagine the pain it must cause to wrestle with this question. What do the angel moms say? They are probably a great help. Obviously seeing the pictures is not something you HAVE to do, and if you are still asking the question, it probably means your heart isn’t ready to face it yet. I’d wait until I sensed the sweet voice of the Lord saying, “Let’s go see them together.” He may or may not say such a thing, but regardless, He’ll be with you when (or if) you decide you need to see them for closure. Often the anticipation of a hard day is worse than the actual day when it finally comes. My friend’s dad, who was killed instantly by a drunk driver, said she eventually got to the point she wanted to see the car, to see the last place her dad was alive, and though it was very, very hard, she is glad she laid the curiosity to rest. I don’t know if it’s different because you lost a child, but hers is the only one of its kind I can think of where the question is “Should I or shouldn’t I?”