OK…Here is the deal.  When Scott died I was told by the insurance co. that a family member should not go and clean out the car.  They said that the tow truck driver did not think it would be a good idea.  So we asked a dear friend of ours to do this task for us.  He is a Baltimore City Police Officer and we felt that he had probably seen worse.  Mike did however tell him to take pictures of the car.  He did and he has had them ever since.  I found out recently that Mike asked for them.  He did this several months ago and looked at them.  Now I have been asking to see them for 5 years.  I must admit I was a little A LOT upset when he told me this.  I felt betrayed somehow and I felt like Mike had lied to me.  We have worked that part out.  Seriously we cried and talk and each asked for forgiveness we are fine.  I however am still a mess.  This really threw me into a tailspin.  Now I am wrestling with should I see them or shouldn’t I see them.  It is strange and I will probably sound like a complete crazy person BUT I feel as if Mike now has a part of Scott that I don’t.  Told ya…crazy!!!  He has seen the car that Scott took his last breathe in.  I am just really struggling with what to do.  I have asked all of my on line angel moms.  I have gotten so many mixed opinions I just thought I would ask the few of you that read this.  So what do you think?  Should I or shouldn’t I see the pics???

Several years after Scott died we received a CD from a precious sister in Christ.  It was from http://www.markinc.org/ The Betters’ had lost their son Mark in a car accident at the age of 16. I must say this Cd was sent from God’s heart to our ears. Seriously!!!
Now we have been asked to share our experience about Scott’s death and how the CD helped us at a fund raising dinner. The purpose of the dinner is to raise money so the Cd’s can be made available to people from Dr’s office, clinics etc. free of charge. So I figured I would share what my thoughts are here. Please feel free to let me know if this sounds wrong or off base etc. I appreciate your in put. Did I mention Michael Card will be there? So no pressure to have to get up and speak in front of famous Christians…LOL

Good Evening etc…
On November 1,2002 our 17 year old son Scott was killed in a car accident. Needless to say we were devastated and greatly in need of something anything to help us in our time of extreme pain and loss. We walked around in a fog and we were questioning everything in our lives. Our church family was a great blessing and still are however we really needed to hear from someone who had been there. Someone who would get “it”. By God’s grace a friend of mine had heard Sharon Betters speak several years before and remembered about her loss of Mark. My friend went to the Markinc web site and ordered the CD “The loss of a loved one”. We must say that this was from God’s heart to our ears. To listen to this couples humble and real account of what they had walked through was amazing. To know that stronger Christians than ourselves had questioned God and had struggled with the same things we struggle with was just what we needed to hear. To hear their journey and to know without a doubt that God can be trusted again and that He would see us through was a great source of encouragement and it was like someone had thrown us a lifeline. Someone was ahead of us on this road looking back saying…I know that this road is hard and long come take my hand we can do this with God’s grace and each other. We had never met Chuck and Sharon but we felt like we had known them for years. We cried listening to them tell about the night Mark died. We understood their pain. The things they share on the CD are real and we can not really put into words how powerful and helpful this was to us. We must say that this is one of the best resources we received. It is real, powerful and Gospel centered without being “preachy”. It was and still is our lifeline.
Thank You